You are an engineer and tired of coding…Go and do an MBA. You want to escape marriage for a couple of more years…Do an MBA. Or you are simply tired of the minuscule increments in your current job and it seems it is gonna stay that way…Yes the answer is still do an MBA. But I have a word of caution for you which no one ever tells you before you do an MBA and once you start that is all what you talk about…Its Groups! All MBA institutes have this weird notion that getting a random bunch of 25 year olds from completely diverse set ups can make a very interesting group that is going to tackle the problem given; by looking at it from various perspectives. In my opinion its all BULS**T…I’ll tell you the real deal:
- ITS NEVER A GROUP
Its usually a couple of friends, throw in a nerdy girl or somebody who is popular after the dance they performed at the Freshers'(I don’t know how that helps) and this elusive pretty gal on whom one of these chaps has a crush on.
2. THERE IS NO GOING BACK
Mind you the segregation in groups is more rigid than the caste system followed in the Vedic period. Thou shalt not leave thy group till final year once thy makes it hurriedly without even thinking in the first year…
3. THINKER PLANNER WORKER..WHAT’S THAT?
No one is a Worker and all of us are just planners and thinkers with some really long winded schemes that just don’t work cause no one in the first place tries to make them work!
4. THE IN ABSENTIA MEMBER
There is always this one member who never turns up for the discussions and does absolutely no work and half the group members aren’t even aware of his existence till the day of the presentation.
5. THE TALKER
Remember that person who always gave you advice on how to accomplish some task but would refuse to do it himself. Yes that irritating Big Mouth? No group’s ever complete without this one person who always has an opinion how things are to be done but when they have to be done he just disappears underground into the fields of Hades’.
6. THE IMBALANCED STATUE OF JUSTICE
These are the most intriguing characters in any group. They are the symbol of justice and the messiah of the Do-Gooders. These are the people who believe that however tiny the task is (for eg. even sending a mail for that matter) must be equally distributed amongst all the members. It’s like they sit with some electronic scales that apportion the work.<facepalm>
7. THE LEADER
The prime job that a leader has is to make a whatsapp group the instant an assignment is declared cause how on earth will the non-existing communication happen?
8. THE GOOGLE CHAMP
If you have one of these well you are pretty sorted. Their fingers are permanently poised over the Google Search option and they can get you data like a Pro but they are hard to come by and once immersed in their search will follow whichever line of thought or shall I say line of search which catches their fancy.
9. THE CRIBBER
This is that one person who will dampen every discussion by just whining about the never-ending assignments, their break up, World Peace, Terrorism and a 1428765 such topics .You need to learn how to console them without appearing to be completely oblivious.
10. THE IDIOT
This is that fool who actually thought that this combination of homo sapiens put together in an intellectually stimulating environment will work to solve problems. Usually his/her dreams break a couple of days before the deadline when this sorry little piece of humanity sits down and completes the entire assignment from scratch. Even after all this, the silly over optimistic person that they are, they feel that there will come a time when the group will bond and actually cooperate with each other. Who is gonna break the bubble for them haan???